Celebrity homes that no one wants to buy – and why

Photo-Illustration: Bordered; Photos: Getty Images

In a housing market where even a renovator with asbestos and severe water damage can’t seem to stay on the market for more than a few days (according to a recent report from Redfin, a third of homes that contracted in the past month had an offer accepted within a week of listing) some notoriously unsaleable celebrity homes have finally found buyers. Joe Pesci’s $ 6.5 million Jersey Shore home, for example, sold earlier this month after two years on the market. Rosie O’Donnell’s mansion in Saddle River was sold in the spring, five years after it was first listed (it is being demolished and turned into affordable housing).

Yet a handful of languid celebrity houses have continued to… well, to languish. We took it upon ourselves to understand why.

Tom Girardi and Erika Jayne’s $ 8.9million Pasadena Mansion

First list: May 2021

Price drop : 3 (in June, July, and August)

The listing describes this mansion as having “old world opulence” – which translates into dark wood panels (used liberally, even in bathrooms) and very prominent coffered ceilings. Meanwhile, recent sales of similarly priced Pasadena properties are light and bright, with lighter, sleeker wall treatments and more modern kitchens. Then there is the legal background. Girardi Law Firm Sued For Allegedly Embezzling Settlement Funds For Victims Of Lion Air Flight 610 Crash and for using the couple’s divorce as a ploy to hide their assets. Even three big price cuts didn’t help it out of the market.

Serena Williams’ $ 7.5 million Beverly Hills home

Photo: Google Maps

First list: March 2021

Price drop : 0

This house is a very nice 6,000 square foot Spanish style construction, but it is, in our opinion, almost too normal for almost $ 8 million. There is simply no the there – it’s all the white walls, the pale wood floors and the steel-framed windows. The outdoor space is also a bit disappointing. There are only a few relatively shallow balconies and a narrow backyard and pool wedged into a triangle-shaped corner of the grounds. Compare that to a slightly cheaper house down the block, where you can get a larger pool (plus a massive gazebo), turreted staircase, and tons of crown molding.

The Rock’s $ 7.5 million equestrian estate outside of Atlanta

Photo: Google Maps

First list: January 2021

Price drop : 0

The 45-acre property is singular in size, price (the average asking price in Powder Springs, Ga. Is around $ 396,000), and horse accommodation in the area (it includes a barn of 12 stalls and a merry-go-round with a panoramic terrace). Who else is going to buy it other than an actor who shoots a lot in Georgia?

Pierce Brosnan’s $ 100 Million Beach House in Malibu

First list: September 2020

Price drop : 0 (currently off market)

The 13,000-square-foot mansion was designed with a Southeast Asian aesthetic (lots of exterior wooden columns and beams), apparently inspired by Brosnan’s filmmaking experience Tomorrow never dies in Thailand. So it’s a bit more of a specific taste among the many modern glass boxes and Spanish-style mansions in the area. The price tag also looks like a waterfall. LA made a few sales of over $ 100 million last year (to Jeff Bezos and WhatsApp founder Jan Koum), but these properties were real estates (both in Beverly Hills) with at least six acres ( compared to just over an acre at Brosnan’s).

Mary J. Blige’s $ 3 Million New Jersey Home

Photo: Google Maps

First list: August 2019

Price drop : 0 (in fact, there were two prizes increases)

It’s never a good sign when the listing doesn’t have any interior photos. The list mentions a gym, an office and three fireplaces, but leaves them to the imagination. (An earlier listing included a photo of a huge aft deck opening out to a sort of bean-shaped pool with a spooky puddle). Regardless, anyone looking for a comparable home (at least five beds and five baths on nearly an acre) has a half-dozen other options, with plenty of images showing grand staircases, islets. kitchen, wood-paneled ceilings, etc.

Kid Rock’s $ 2.2 Million Settlement on the Detroit River

Photo: Google Maps

First list: July 2019

Price drop : 0

There are only four single-family homes asking for over $ 1 million in Detroit right now, so the pool of potential buyers is quite small. And if they don’t like a colonial style house with three skylights and a serious colonnade, then forget it. The admittedly very nice private boathouse (with a large roof terrace and Jet Ski lifts) means that the buyer must be water-inclined as well.

MAtt Lauer’s $ 44M Sag Harbor Estate

First list: June 2019

Price drop : 1 (September 2019)

It is so expensive. The second most expensive property currently for sale in Sag Harbor represents less than half of the demand at $ 21 million. Then there is Lauer’s tarnished reputation for his allegations of sexual harassment.

Rihanna’s $ 7.3 million Hollywood Hills home

Photo: Google Maps

First list: december 2018

Price drop : 1 (October 2021, one month after registering it a second time for $ 300,000 more than the initial request)

This gated property is one of the most expensive in the Mount Olympus area and, at 7,130 square feet and 0.44 acres, it’s also one of the largest. The aesthetic here, however, is just too much everywhere. The light fixtures and finishes look new but already dated, like the dark brown kitchen cabinets with brown streaked counters (ditto on the backsplash). The bathroom’s ridged herringbone tile floors are chaotic. The frosted glass railings on the outside don’t look very expensive.

Jennifer Lopez’s $ 25 million NoMad penthouse

Photo: Google Maps

First list: October 2017 for $ 27 million

Price drop : 1 (March 2019; currently off market)

The Whitman is near the corner of East 26th Street and Madison Avenue, just above Madison Square Park, which may be an area too busy for the wealthy seeking privacy (according to the New York To post, who cited an insider, that was the very reason Lopez listed the property). And while the unit is indeed a penthouse, the building is only six stories tall, the shortest in the entire block, and is sandwiched between much taller buildings). Maybe that’s just not enough of a ‘up there’ feeling for billionaires? Most announcements in this price range since the pandemic are for either lavish penthouses (or townhouses) near Central Park or in Tribeca.

Shakira’s $ 15.9 million Miami Beach home

Photo: Google Maps

First list: December 2013

Price drop : 1 (between two price increases; currently off-market)

It is not immediately clear why this property would not sell. Its price is quite reasonable for the area and has everything you would expect (at least six bedrooms, a pool, 100 feet of water frontage with a dock). The interior is understated in this all white and minimal way, but that’s not surprising in Miami. Perhaps the design, featuring a series of low-slung and hipped-roof structures, is too modest for people who drop millions in Miami these days.

Michael Jordan’s $ 14.9 million mansion in Illinois

First list: February 2012

Price drop : 3

Jordan’s nearly 33,000-square-foot home (with a regulation-sized basketball court and a massive “23” on the front door) remains by far the most expensive listing in the Chicago suburb of Highland Park, where even the most expensive sales of late were well under $ 3 million (including Scottie Pippen’s mansion, which ultimately sold for $ 1.8 million this month after four years on the market) . The list doesn’t seem to be particularly difficult at this point – it contains six paltry images and mentions Jordan before anything else in the description.

Sonja Morgan’s $ 8.8 million Upper East Side townhouse

Photo: Google Maps

First list: 2008

Price drop : At least 3 (between a few price increases; currently off-market)

Morgan’s Townhouse (which was taken off the market again in August) is pretty normal on its own (huge chandeliers, about five fireplaces, a back garden and another terrace or two), but the location just isn’t very charming. It’s a short walk from an F / G train entrance which would usually be a plus but maybe not for potential townhouse buyers. It is also located right next to a 20-story, 157-unit condominium. next to Morgan’s front door.

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